Coaches, I’m sure this has happened to you at some point. You get ready, head to your office, take out your notepad and pen, and dial into your coaching session. Your client joins the call, you give a warm welcome, check-in on how they are doing or maybe on how they did on any action items from your previous session, and you sense in the air that it’s time to get to it. You pause, and say something like “So what would you like coaching on today?” Crickets. Your client moans, “I’ve been trying to think of one for today and I couldn’t think of one!” or croaks embarrassed, “I forgot to think of a topic” or “things are going good, I’m not sure what I’d like to work on.”

Oh boy, this might have at one point thrown you off your rocker “Oh my gosh my client is paying me for coaching! And what the heck are we supposed to do for the next hour if there is no topic?!” We’ve all been there. However, not to fret, this is so normal, and will happen frequently in your coaching with your clients.

While this can be confronting at first and invite in all sorts of unhelpful, limiting beliefs where you as the coach can get lost in your own level 1 listening and swirl into an “about you” mindset, let’s look at how you can view this as actually an incredibly powerful invitation to some unexpected coaching opportunities.

Without having a plan for the inevitable “I don’t have a topic today”, you set yourself up for various unhelpful situations to occur in that session. Perhaps accidentally making your client feel guilty for not coming with a topic, feeling like you have to “do your time” and “make it through the session”, or that your wasting each other’s time, or slogging your way through a coaching session where you feel the need to carry the session and quarterback it every step of the way. And what an exhausting and dissonant time that would be.

Let’s look at some alternatives.

Here are 5 paths I like to take when a client comes to a session without a clear topic they want coaching on that day.

5 Paths to Take When The Session has no clear topic

First, let’s briefly recap what a topic is in coaching for people who are perhaps new to coaching. In a coaching relationship, the client and coach design what the main overarching focus areas for the engagement will be early on. Then, in each individual session as part of that greater engagement, the client comes to the session with a specific topic they want coaching on that day. Often that session topic is connected to their greater goals, but it doesn’t need to be. For example, a client’s overarching focus area in coaching might be to get clarity on what they want next and move into a new job. A topic they might bring to a specific session could be “I’m feeling like an imposter in interviews”.

Let’s look at 5 things you can do when there’s no clear topic in a session.

1.) Three Things Going On

Ask your client “what are three things going on for you right now?”. You can play with the wording, and what number feels right for you. I recommend using at least three because at that point it starts to paint more of a picture. Four or five can work well too. Play with it and see what works well for you.

What you’re essentially doing here is taking the stress out of the situation of “oh no, no topic!” making it more casual and bringing it back to your connection and mining for directions to head.

Often, this leads to one of these scenarios:

They Discover a Topic

In listing the three things going on, the client realizes that they actually do have a good topic for coaching. As they describe the three things going on they might then say something like “oh actually I do have an interview coming up, let’s coach on how I want to show up to that interview.” Cool, you are off an on your way!

Coach: No problem, let’s explore a bit and I’m sure we can find a good topic. What are three things going on for you right now?

Client: Well, I’m working a ton, there are lots of big projects right now and I’m working a ton of hours. I have been working out a lot and am feeling great there, and we have a vacation coming up soon. Hey actually, I’m super tired from working so much. Actually that would be a helpful topic to explore… I think I’m so immersed in it I didn’t even consider it as a good topic until just now. Let’s do that, I want to make sure I don’t burnout.

It Gives Space for a Bigger Topic

In listing the three things, they actually reveal a topic they had either thought of and were too shy or emotional to share.

Coach: No problem, let’s explore a bit and I’m sure we can find a good topic. What are three things going on for you right now?

Client: My business is moving along, I keep meaning to cook healthier, and I’m considering getting a divorce….

This potential divorce might be something they actually want coaching on, but they got stage fright and instead said “I don’t have a topic today.” In offering the client to list three things going on for them, it creates a less confronting, lower stakes way of bringing in potential topics. They might nestle the “scary” or “emotional” topic in with some lighter things going on. And it feels like an easier way to bring it to the conversation.

It Builds Connection and Expands Range of Topics

They list three things going on and then continue and end up listing way more things going on. This is an opportunity to deepen your connection and be curious about their life. It could also expand the range of topics going on in their life that they bring in general to coaching. You can say something like “hey, those are all things we can explore in coaching. I know we have primarily been exploring your career change, but those are all areas we can explore together too.” It can sound obvious to you as a coach, but your client might not have previously considered or known those other areas were fair game to bring to your coaching.

2.) Overall Goal, Big Agenda or Vision

Connect back to the bigger vision you and your client explored at the beginning of working together, likely the main goal they brought or reason they hired you as a coach. Bring it back to that bigger vision, and see what is there for them now.

3.) Wheel of Life Re-visit

You likely will have done something like the Wheel of Life with your client at this point. You can either dust off the version you did previously and take a look there together. Which of the categories would they like coaching on today?

Or, you can have your client re-take the Wheel of Life today. As your client goes about living their life, the way they’d score and fill out the Wheel of Life will be different. So even if they did it three months ago, today it will likely tell a different story. And hey, if it’s exactly the same, then that’s something worth talking about too.

4.) Bring in a Tool

Values mining, strengths exploring, life purpose statements, vision boarding, what tools do you love to use with clients? When a client doesn’t come with a topic, this can be a great opportunity to introduce one of your tools you think they’d get something from, and add that dimension to your work together.

5.) Silence

This one can be intimidating, but silence can be a powerful way to get to a topic. When your client says they don’t have at a topic for this call, a few moments of silence where you let those words breathe, and don’t rush to respond, can be powerful. It can be tempting to rush in and “rescue” your client – you might feel the urge to protect them from “feeling bad” that they don’t have a topic, or to normalize it. Or even, you might feel paranoid that they didn’t bring a topic and make this about you and spiral into thoughts of (if they don’t have a topic are they getting value from our coaching? Will they quit our coaching? Ah!). The thing is, all of that is really about you.

When you resist the urge to rush in and rescue your client here, you are actually showing your client profound respect.

Pausing when a client says they don’t have a topic, and waiting, letting them speak next, makes the floor theirs. It lets the air in the conversation be theirs. It creates space to invite in what they might be reticent to say, but would like to. It slows down. It moves beyond the snappy default format of conversation, and settles in. It trusts your client. It allows space to be surprised, to be amazed, to be honest.

When a client comes to a session without an obvious, fully-formed, ready-to-coach topic, take this as an opportunity to be there with your client, and see where you might head together. “I don’t have a topic” can truly be the best topic in your coaching together yet.